Praise be to the LORD my Rock,

who trains my hands for war,

my fingers for battle. Psalm 144:1

A month ago, when I would look up into the night sky and see the constellation of Orion, my spirit would ache inside me. A Chuisle mo Chroi, Kristina, has told me that when she looks up sees Orion she thinks of me, her warrior. A warrior--I have always been passionate about being a warrior for God. I yearn to put the same level of dedication and commitment into serving God as that Jonathan's unnamed armor-bearer put into serving his charge (I Samuel 14:1-14). I have always yearned to be the kind of man who would have climbed that cliff after Jonathan to face countless enemies.

In Christ, we can all be warriors in our everyday lives. I think that what made Jonathan and his armor-bearer consummate warriors was not their confidence in arms, but their confidence in God. There are countless incidents in the Bible in which ordinary men and women step up in unprecedented courage--take David, Hadassah, Paul, Deborah, Jeremiah, and Abigail for instance. These men and women saw what God called them to do and then did it, even if it may have seemed impossible. Think of what it would have taken to be a prophet like Jeremiah--to personally stand in the gap between God and an entire nation of hardened hearts. The prophets were often alone, one man set up by God to speak against an entire people. Can you imagine? Imagine yourself as Hadassah, placed into a situation in which not only your life and the lives of your closest friends, but the lives of an entire nation are all dependent on the success of one mission. No pressure, right? Sorta makes David and Goliath feel like a tea party. And yet she placed everything in the hands of God and laid her life and the lives of hundreds of thousands into God's hands. As immensely mind-boggling as her situation was, God is infinite in every way. If God is on our side, why should we be afraid? Especially when he has given us the promise of his presence? We are all called to be warriors, to be brave and undaunted in the face of the impossible. We are called to face the obscure mists of our futures with a resolute courage and faith, to stride into that 'huge' project that seems so impossibly daunting, to face the possibility of failure yet again. And we as warriors of God are promised victory.

The thing is, I have been struggling with an identity issue. When I would look up at Orion, I would not see myself--I would only see how far short I seemed to be of that ideal. My faith is so weak that I am overrun with fears of all kinds that wreak havoc in my life. But God never gives up. Ever. I had a terrible few months during which I could not remember what victory felt like. Can you relate? I had so many falls that I was losing hope completely. I felt so helpless--the Jars of Clay refrain "I have no fear of drowning; it's the breathing that's taking all this work" echoed in my head as I kept treading and spitting out water. Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil...

This month has been great. Actually, I would go as far as saying it has been the greatest month of victories I have ever had. For Thou art with me... God is always there when you are ready to rely on him and place your faith in His ability to turn you, yes, even you, into a warrior. On an interesting note, Proverbs 16:32 says: "Better a patient man than a warrior." Sometimes we might feel like Moses... things sure happened pretty slowly for him, but the good news is we are in God's hands and he knows just what he is doing. Life started to get better for me when I started to trust that God has my back--yeah, I knew he did already, but if knowledge+belief =action, I was sorta missing the middle part of the equation. Do you believe in your identity as a treasured son or daughter of God? Do believe in your identity as a warrior?

One of my favorite scenes ever captured by film is from The Two Towers, when Gandalf releases Theoden from Grima's leechcraft. He advises Theoden, "perhaps your hands would remember their old strength better if they grasped you sword." When he grabbed hold of the sword, he became aware of the deceit that had sapped his strength and his identity as a warrior. He saw through the lies and found the truth. Grab hold of the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God, and break out of any lies that hold you captive--you are a warrior, a man or woman of action, a courageous fighter of valor. Fight the good fight today, and may the Lord be with you.

Forgetting who you are?

Psalm 23 Psalm 139 Romans 8:31-39 Galatians 5:1